TEN WORDS THAT DON'T EXIST BUT SHOULD

Russian has a word for “the feeling you harbor for someone you used to love” — razbliuto.  In Papua New Guinea folks speak of “mokita — the truth everyone knows but no one speaks.”  German words describe so much that English had to steal them — Zeitgeist, Schadenfreude, wanderlust, wunderkind. . .

Since 1776, the language called “American” has been filling in the gaps — podunk, hornswoggled, backasswards — but new words are always needed.  Here are ten dreamed up some years ago for Harper’s.  Dig it!

1.  Hospitility n.,— (hospitality + hostility) — the art of inviting people over in order to insult them, as practiced on many political talk shows.

2. Drivulet, n., (drivel + rivulet) — A small but constant stream of fatuous talk.  “I left the party because the drivulet just kept coming.”

3. Dudeism, n., (dude + ism) — A creed or behavior based on sports fanaticism, maudlin displays of patriotism, shouting “YES!” In victory, high-five hand slapping, etc.

4.  Muchismo, n., mucho + machismo) — The bravura born of owning many trendy objects.

5.  Exercist, n., (exercise + masochist) — A person who exercises excessively and then complains about the difficulty, pain, or effort involved.

6.  Rememory, n., (re + memory) — A memory of a memory — “She realized that all she had of her childhood was rememory.”

7.  Bambify, v., (Bambi + modify) To imbue animals with cartoon like bourgeois attitudes and morals.  “The dog owner couldn’t help but bambify her adorable pooch.”

8.  Videolalia, n., (video + echolalia) — Compulsive viewing of videos showing events that just took place.  “Her videolalia forced her to whip out her phone and show us the videos she’d taken twenty minutes ago.”

9. Environnui, n., (environment + ennui) — Listlessness and vague despair from hearing too many tales of environmental woe.

10.  Assoholic, n., (jackass + alcoholic) — A person who behaves habitually like a jackass.  “His wife left him because he was such an assoholic.”  See dudeism.

OKAY, GOT ANY IDEAS FOR NEW WORDS? PLEASE COMMENT BELOW.

FROM IN A WORD:  A Harper’s Magazine Dictionary fo Words that Don’t Exist But Ought To